For Deborah: Things You Didn't Know About Me
>In the past four years, I have gained 45 pounds.
>I've never stolen anything from a retail store, but in high school I once outsourced the theft of Allen Ginsberg's Cosmopolitan Greetings from a suburban Milwaukee bookseller.
>I never wanted to be a poet. Growing up, I wanted to be a filmmaker. Secretly, I wanted to front a rock band.
>I play three instruments: trumpet (7 years), piano (1 year of lessons), and guitar (self taught).
>In college I marched in a homecoming parade dressed as a human condom. I distributed condoms to the crowd.
>In the float that lined up across from us: Jesse Ventura and his gubernatorial campaign staff.
>I lived in residence halls for seven years.
>In high school, I was elected my class's Prom King.
>I wore black Reeboks to prom.
>I smoked for seven years/quit three years ago. I bit my nails for 20 years/quit two years ago.
>The religion most compatible with my spiritual beliefs is Quakerism (in a liberal form, naturally).
>I had my eyebrow pierced three different times in my life: twice during college and once during grad school. I also pierced my left ear and my bellybutton in college.
>After I pierced my belly button, I gained 20 pounds and couldn't show it to anyone.
>The only non-literary celebrity I've met in real life is Chris Isaak. I drooled and nearly passed out.
>I don't like New York at all, but I am obsessed with San Francisco and Los Angeles.
>I have been photographed naked.